Parenting Together as a Team
Relationship Boosters Podcast Episode 7
Successfully navigate the world of parenting together.
How to successfully co-parent with your partner
The best time to begin discussions about developing a parenting style is prior to having children, and this should be revisited over time.
Having discussions about parenting is extremely important. In many relationships, these discussions never occur. The failure to address parental differences can ultimately lead to serious problems in your relationship. If you recognize that you have not had this discussion, and you’re in a serious relationship, this is the time to begin having conversations about parenting.
Remember, it’s never too late to have these important discussions, and ongoing discussions about parenting is essential.
You can work find out more about Bynia Reed through her website: www.centeredsupport.com
The resources she provided are as follows:
Chats with Monika: How to make your blended family work
Tips to Be Successful as a Blended family
o Make decisions together.
o How do you perceive your role as a parent of the child? You and your partner should have a conversation about this topic.
o Don’t throw mistakes in your partner’s face.
o Talk about what is not working, and how you can work to change those things that are not working.
o When you don’t say anything, it may bring about uncomfortable feelings. Be open to allowing conversation.
o Bring the children in and allow them to take part in the conversation. Allowing children to express feelings and not have penalties for their feelings can be a gift.
o Model respect by expressing your feelings without being disrespectful. Use this as a teaching moment.
o This is the child’s parent, so be careful when having conversations around the children
o Show respect toward the biological parent. Do not make negative statements about their parent. Control yourself and your emotions.
o Allow your household to be a peaceful place by not allowing the other parent “to walk around in your house.”
Episode 5: Let’s Talk About Sex!
Boosting Your Sex Life With Carol-Ann Trotman
Sex is a topic that many couples do not speak about; however, this is a topic that needs to be addressed. Discussing sex and topics related to sex can help you better enjoy your sex life. Not talking about sex in your relationship can hinder your relationship in many ways; you are preventing yourself and your partner from having more satisfaction in your sex life.
Many couples share that they do not begin a discussion about sex due to fear of hurting their partner’s feelings; however, even if you do not bring up your concerns, you may still be sending off negative non-verbal messages to your partner.
How to begin conversations about sex and sexual pleasure.
Sex conversations should be ongoing. Make time to have a conversation regarding sex.
Sex is a topic that you or your partner may experience anxiety talking about; therefore, make the conversation comfortable. Take risks in your relationship, be vulnerable.
Tips To Assist With Sex and Sexual Exploration
Do research on your own to better explore how to enhance your sex life. You can also do research with each other to facilitate more discussion.
When having discussions about sex, remember to make it fun not tense.
If you are continuing to experience difficulty, you can always seek counseling services. In a counseling environment, you can get help with further exploring your sex life.
IN HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS, PEOPLE SEEK HELP.
Carol-Ann Trotman suggested the following book:
Esther Perel; Mating In Captivity. In this book; she addresses emotional intelligence and understanding your own and your partner’s ideas about sex.
If there are topics that you would like to hear on the podcast, send your emails to email@example.com
Dating is something that should occur in every stage of the relationship
Dating and Date night is quality time together to enhance your relationship. Think of date night as intentional play!
The most common reason that many couples don’t have date night
There is NO legitimate excuse that will make your partner feel good about being neglected. These excuses send the message that my partner or my relationship is not a priority. Ask yourself, Is your relationship, partnership, marriage worth it?
When picking a date night activity ask yourself these questions:
What can we do that will allow us to engage in deep conversation?
How can we enjoy each other’s company?
What is an activity that we can have fun together?
Is there anything new that we can get ourselves into?
Dating does not always have to be expensive. We have listed some date night examples:
If you are looking for an event, you can always check out our upcoming events. Follow the link http://therelationshipboosters.com/events/
The Blind Passenger
Melissa Tate-Scruse speaks about being a blind Passenger in your relationship.
The blind passenger is when you are on someone else’s emotional rollercoaster.
In a relationship, this occurs when one partner is struggling. The partner may be struggling with emotional instability, aggressiveness, alcoholism etc., and their partner is along for the ride.
How to get off of the rollercoaster
In families, there are a lot of necessary conversations that are not happening that stimulate patterns of abuse, divorce, or alcoholism. Make sure that there is room for difficult conversations in your relationship.
Recognize when you fall in love with the potential or the idea of what your partner can be rather than the reality. This is when the reality of the situation does not match your vision. Know that you can’t change others, you can only change yourself.
For more information, you can check out the book Blind Passenger. The book goes into detail about Dr. Melissa’s personal experiences with being a blind passenger. She gives, you a front row seat to her internal struggle as a blind passenger. “She has had to literally and figuratively pick herself up from some raw and shocking situations.”
Interview with Dr. Pauline Belton Establishing Boundaries Boundaries are the cornerstone of any relationship Setting boundaries lets you partner know the things that are important to you. It allows your partner to know what you like and what you expect. It also allows your partner to know he things that make you feel uneasy. When Setting Boundaries Be open or honest about how your experiences shape your world. Share how your feelings have affected you. Communicate your needs to your spouse. Let your partner know the things that make you feel healthy happy and protected Look at your partner like he or she is the love of your life and not an obstacle in your life. This allows you to remain open to their perceptions. It will decrease the defensive response. Types of Boundary Pitfalls Disconnected: When one partner tends to set rigid type boundaries and emphasize self-sufficiency. One person feels “it is all about me.” Overstepping: One person prefers to be more in control in the relationship. The other person will sometimes just go along in an attempt not to cause any trouble. The controlling partner minimizes the boundaries or expectations of their partner. Merged boundaries: The line is blurred. This looks like the lack of individuality, and can lead to being unclear about what will happen in a relationship. Engulfing Boundary: One partner overshadows the other; Only their opinion counts. The assumption is that their partner should go with the flow. This will smother your partner Problems with not discussing boundaries When you don’t divulge the things that make you feel unsafe or insecure, problems can escalate. When you don’t talk, assumptions run free. Remember, the things that you are comfortable with may not be the same things that your partner is comfortable with. This can lead to one person developing frustration and not sharing with their partner, which can contribute to increased problems. You can begin to speak about boundaries at any point in your relationships. As you encounter life, boundaries may adjust; therefore, this needs to be an ongoing conversation. When speaking about boundaries, don’t dictate, have a conversation. Use “I messages” as opposed to you. For example, tell your spouse “I would like to talk about our day when you get home” Overall, Setting Boundaries allows you and your spouse to know what you want the relationship to look like. These boundaries help with establishing the foundation for your relationship.
Newlyweds: tips for after the wedding ceremony
Monika Cope of the Relationship Boosters provides tips and advice for those couples who have just been married.
After you spend thousands of dollars on a wedding, you need to ensure that you are also spending the same time and energy on the actual investment, your marriage. Listed below are some things to consider when moving into the next phase of your relationship.
The real work begins when the wedding is all said and done.
This podcast is for those who are interested in improving their intimate relationship. If you are in a relationship, and believe in keeping the spark alive, this podcast is for you. For those couples who are dating, engaged, newlyweds, married, or in a long term relationship, we will focus on enhancing your intimate connection.
Dr. Kia James, will interview specialists, relationship coaches, marriage counselors, and successful couples to bring you tips, advice, and strategies for making your good relationship or marriage better. Of course, these tips can also benefit couples who are experiencing relationship stress. We will cover topics related to successful co-parenting, creating a healthy blended family, dating, sex, love, passion, supporting your partner, and much more. Nurture your relationship and avoid relationship road blocks. Tune in as we discuss relationship tips that will give your relationship that extra boost!